Vince wrote:
I'm 22 and i feel bad/sad/irritated that i havent found someone yet. I know people are gonna say "Aww you're still young." but i feel kinda sick, that i've lived a third of my life, and i havent found anyone to share the rest with.
Positive mental attitude, mate! 22 means you've only lived a quarter of your life.
I know you don't want me to say it but I'm saying it anyway. You ARE still young! Trust me, I was very similar to you when I was your age. Although I wasn't desperate to get married (my marital status remains 'single' today), I longed to love someone and be loved, and to meet that special person.
One of my biggest regrets is that I didn't enjoy my 20s more. For the early part I was very angst-ridden and overly desperate, to the point where, although I befriended women fairly easily, I scared them off quite quickly because they realised I was far too self-conscious. Moving to London didn't help as it's not easy to meet people there if you don't have many friends to establish networks with. I should have been out having fun but instead I was working five days a week and going through the motions at weekends. The only people I really socialised with were people from work.
Luckily, the angst in me died down as I passed my mid-20s and I began to realise that I should lighten up and not see meeting 'the one' as a priority. As luck would have it, two openings occurred: firstly, I was chucked out of my then lodgings by a mad landlady and moved into a shared house with four other guys around my age. They re-introduced me to weekends on the town and suddenly I was living like a proper single male again, making the best of my free time and enjoying nights out, as well as the occasional fling.
At the same time, a friend of a friend who worked in a pub found out that I was partial to karaoke and invited me to that pub's twice-weekly karaoke night. I was astonished at how quickly my confidence rocketed through singing and also how quickly I befriended regulars. And, sure enough, I met my girlfriend there.
I'm now 32, still with the woman in question and very happy. I can't give you any definitive advice because I realise there are cultural differences between UK and Indian lifestyles but my point is that, while often the road to true love is complicated and unpredictable, everyone gets there in the end. The lyrics to Love Comes Quickly are actually pretty damn accurate!
Ultimately, try to enjoy yourself as much as possible while you're young - 22 is genuinely no age at all - and not brood too much about romance. I wish I'd done so because I feel I wasted several years post-university thinking I hadn't made the most of the freedom I had there, and that I may have missed the boat romantically, which seems utterly ridiculous now. It may not happen immediately but you'll meet 'the one', trust me.
Oh, and one more thing - a relationship with a fellow PSB fan isn't always ideal. I've dated two and neither had a happy ending.
Passion, love, sex, money, violence, religion, injustice and death. More on that story later.
