This is supposed to be kinda funny

:
You Know You're From Chicago When:
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
You measure distance in minutes.
You know several people who have hit a deer....and sometimes the same deer.
Your school classes were canceled because of the cold.
Your school classes were canceled because of the heat.
Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary proposition. For example: "Where's my coat at?" or If you go to town I wanna go with."
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain or animal.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.
You carry jumper cables in your car.
You don't pronounce the "s" in Illinois like the rest of the world.
Vacation means going to Six Flags.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
You know if another Illinoisan is from southern, central or northern Illinois as soon they open their mouth.
You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter and Construction.
You think that deer season is a national holiday.
The local paper covers national and international headlines on one page but requires 6 pages from sports.
There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1,000 or more.