Is life more simple when you're young?

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tweety · #31 Post by **tweety** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:03 am

It's not a question of age, really. As long as you care (and think too much) life is complicated. But then again, it's better when it's complicated - makes you feel alive.

I love life. Happiness is being able to experience it all.

DJCulture · #32 Post by **DJCulture** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:06 am

I think life is simpler when you're young. Like many others have said, you are still under your parent's wing and don't have many worries - apart from doing your homework on time or something!

I'm now officially in my early 30s and I still don't really know where my life is going. At the moment my job has hit a dead end and I don't really feel like I live anywhere. My parents moved away from London last year to Clacton (on the North Essex coast). As I was still saving up to buy my own place I felt I had to go with them (if I'd stayed in London to rent I'd never have been able to save up a deposit for a place). Now I'm living in Clacton at weekends and staying with my Aunt in London during the week. I feel like I'm in limbo at the moment. Hopefully I'll have enough money soon to be able to up roots and start again somewhere.

tweety · #33 Post by **tweety** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:19 am

amhilde wrote:Back to the original topic- some friends and I have talked about how we were the generation that got shoved through school having "university, university, university" chanted at us day and night- as if it was the be all and end all of existence and if you didnt have a degree then you were a social failure. In the US especially there was/is horrendous pressure put on us to do everything possible to make your high school transcript better than the other kids. So what happens? Everyone went to university and here we all sit while the kids that went into trades ( and people need to go into trades, not everyone is suited for university) are doing well and dandy. In the past, in the long run, the degree gave you more buying power, but now im starting to wonder if this is really true from this point in time forward when the value of a bachelors degree has subsequently declined due to over supply.

I see this happening in Finland as well. The University is full of people who obviously should be somewhere else. They have to take the same exams five times to pass, they're not able to scrape together enough study credits and in the end they're not gonna be able to finish their degree. And if they do they have no idea what they've learned.

I've always been one with the brains but sometimes I feel that I'd be happier if I was, say, a shoemaker. Shoes are so difficult - they never fit. Wouldn't it be great if you could make beautiful shoes that are comfortable as well? I told this to my aunt who told me "not to waste those brilliant brains". And my grandma is still upset because I didn't go to the medical school.

It bothers me. Even if you're smart, why does everbody have to see it? Why can't you just be smart by yourself?

Shopper · #34 Post by **Shopper** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:33 am

I think its also that parents could be realising their unfulfilled dreams through their kids. Maybe they didnt have the means and opportunities to study further or work in a field of choice. So its natural that they have certain expectations from their kids and channelise their thoughts to something more respectable.

Kiran · #35 Post by **Kiran** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:34 am

Shopper wrote:I think its also that parents could be realising their unfulfilled dreams through their kids.

Nonsense, but my son is going to be a champion F1 driver.

Avalon · #36 Post by **Avalon** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:34 am

tweety wrote:Even if you're smart, why does everbody have to see it? Why can't you just be smart by yourself?

Good point... I guess that's why I like to pretend I'm stupid - it just puts lets pressure on me. People don't expect that much of me and why would I have to prove to others anyway how smart I am?

Is it just because you're smart, you have to study some arty-smarty profession, so you can show off how far you can make it, even though it means you'll be stuck with a job you don't like?

As if some smart person can't lead a great life when following a path which is supposedly bellow his/her capacities...

Avalon · #37 Post by **Avalon** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:36 am

Kiran wrote:
Shopper wrote:I think its also that parents could be realising their unfulfilled dreams through their kids.
Nonsense, but my son is going to be a champion F1 driver.

You'd better hurry then, cos in a couple of years there won't be any F1 anyway! Good riddens, though, everyone knows the "sport" went downhill after Keke stopped racing...

mindboy · #38 Post by **mindboy** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 10:50 am

Without no doubt - I agree with Neil sooooo often.

PigletWildebeest · Thu 29 Apr 2004, 11:03 am

Everyone went to university and here we all sit while the kids that went into trades ( and people need to go into trades, not everyone is suited for university) are doing well and dandy. In the past, in the long run, the degree gave you more buying power, but now im starting to wonder if this is really true from this point in time forward when the value of a bachelors degree has subsequently declined due to over supply.

I went to university, basically because it's the only thing I wanted to do, I wanted to learn psychology, I wanted to learn, learn learn. But now I've been graduated almost a year and I have no job.
Nothing.
Here I am with my fancy degree and five years of work, and I'll be joining the unemployment lines next month.
It's utterly depressing.

Scandal · #40 Post by **Scandal** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 5:56 pm

tweety wrote:

It bothers me. Even if you're smart, why does everbody have to see it? Why can't you just be smart by yourself?

I have this problem too. Just because I am a Cambridge graduate and have degrees in Computer Systems Engineering and English Literature everybody expects me to have a fancy career earning pots of money. I am often accused of wasting my talent. My trouble, like many here, is that I don't know what I want to do with the rest of my life. I know I want to leave my mark and be happy, but the question is how? Anwers on a postcard please....

#41 Post by **Drico One** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 6:03 pm

tweety wrote:
It bothers me. Even if you're smart, why does everbody have to see it? Why can't you just be smart by yourself?

Or modest, even?

Drico.

amhilde · #42 Post by **amhilde** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 6:41 pm

Yup PWB- the next time i hear someone say "but you have a masters degree" while they have jobs and I get to try and find one now im overqualified Im going to scream. I like to learn as well, but it seems like there is no place in the world anymore for "scholars"- you have to prove yourself to be economically viable ( to use a phrase from Falling Down

)- which is fine, you have to do that anyway if you want to be a professor, but still, it usually means having to study something you would rather not study so that you can potentially get a job. Though that seems to suit many people just fine.

Im pretty tired of people asking me what im going to do or what i want to do or telling me "oh youll get something you are so smart" or whatever. I dont just want SOMETHING, i want a reason to get up in the morning and go to work and feel like im contributing to the human race rather than lining someone elses pockets. Security is nice, but eventually you hit a point where you either just need to do what you want to do or the time and chance will pass you by. The unknown is scary and most people tend to shy away from it and go the easy route. sometimes I wonder if the folks with the house and the kids ever think "my god what did i do?" or "wow, this is tedious".

Ray · #43 Post by **Ray** » Thu 29 Apr 2004, 11:03 pm

My family all expected me to work in a bank when I finish my studies. I would have a clean cut, wear a suit, sit behind the window answering questions such as "how come I suddenly owe you 500 Euro?" and basically have one of these jobs you don't really want to go about during parties, unless you want the person chatting to you to find something else to do very quickly.

Thing is, I thought that was a good plan. I would have preferred to be a programmer, but working in a bank would do as well. Deep inside I would have of course preferred being a pop star or a designer, but being a reasonable person I knew that working in a bank was a far more sensible thing to do. Till after two years of my studies it somehow came to my mind that perhaps working in a bank isn't exactly interesting.

As you may know, I now work as a designer, I don't even own a suit, haven't worn a tie for 8 years (and don't think I'll ever wear one again, I hate ties passionately)... and my family sort of realised that maybe actually I was right when I decided not to pursue a career in finances when they found out I earn more after two years of career than my mum does after 25 years of work. They even supported me when I was unemployed for six months...

Amhilde -- I think some of them do, some of them don't; yet by the point you're stuck with a house you're going to pay for for the next 50 years and with kids it's too late. Maybe that's why some of the people here avoid long-term relationships -- so as not to commit to the life they're living because they're not sure they're satisfied with it and they don't want to find themselves in a point where there's no undo?

I'm sure Douglas Coupland already wrote a book or two about that

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Scandal · #44 Post by **Scandal** » Sat 01 May 2004, 9:10 pm

I am definitely not coping with getting older. Today I was described as a 'woman' and I burst into tears. Up until now I have always been described as a 'girl' or as a 'young lady', so it was quite a shock hearing myself described as a woman. It made me feel really old!

A similar thing happened a couple of weeks ago. I saw my friend's car parked outside an off-licence so I thought it would be funny if I hid and then jumped out and surprised him. So I crouched down behind his car and waited for him to return. Whilst I was crouched down a woman came up to me with a great look of concern on her face. She asked me if I was all right. To my horror, I realized this woman did not see a young person having a bit of fun, but a grown-up woman in distress. I could have died with embarrassment!

It is all very well me saying I feel like a teenager and I live like a teenager, but I look like a respectable woman! Maybe I should get a mohican like Ray....

Ray · #45 Post by **Ray** » Sat 01 May 2004, 9:18 pm

Actually I just (exactly one minute ago) shaved mine :] I'm a skinhead now. Still not racist though

I'm definitely not coping with being an adult. Why does my ID say I'm 26 years old I've no idea but I'm sure there's been a mistake. Judging from the way *I* perceive myself I'm about 19.

*thinking* Maybe this thread is an answer as to why the Aimoo's "Highly Sensitive Person" forum was so popular